Finals Week Meltdown: Coffee, Puke, and Dead Laptops
Ok, so I gotta share this disaster of a finals week that actually happened to a friend of a cousin of mine. I swear, this stuff is *too* real and it’s hilarious (in a tragic way). Buckle up because this is straight-up chaos.
So, it’s like 3 days before finals, right? And my friend’s buddy—let’s call him Jake—is just drowning in stress. He’s the classic overachiever who’s studied all semester, but suddenly panic hits him like a truck. Usually, he’s pretty chill, but this time? Nah, he’s on the verge of a mental breakdown.
He’s got like a 15-page paper due in 48 hours, three finals, and a mental capacity that’s pretty much water at this point. So he’s pulling all-nighters, chugging energy drinks, and trying to cram info he’s definitely not retaining. Anyway, on the second night, he finally decides he can’t take it anymore. He’s been staring at his notes and laptop for hours, Hyperventilating, sweating like he’s just run a marathon.
And in his semi-delirium, he does what I guess he thought was a genius move: he sets up his laptop *right* next to his bed, puts on a YouTube playlist of classical music to *study better*, and then, while deeply engrossed in notes, knocks a giant mug of coffee onto his keyboard. For real. The coffee just *splashes* everywhere, short-circuiting his laptop, the screen flickering like something out of a disaster movie.
Next thing you know, his laptop is dead. Like, officially dead. And he’s there, frantically trying to save it, while his dog, who’s been peacefully napping on the bed, gets startled by the commotion and decides to puke on the carpet *right next to him*. So now he’s got a broken laptop, a vomiting dog, and zero motivation.
All of this happens at like 2 AM. So he calls his roommate, who’s trying to sleep, but obviously wakes up, hears the chaos, and mutters something like, "Dude, what the *hell* is going on?" Jake explains, half sobbing, that he needs to print out his quiz, and his printer’s out of ink (because of course it is). So his roommate, half-asleep, tells him to just drive to the 24/7 store.
Jake, in his panicked state, throws on whatever hoodie and pants he finds, forgetting to switch out of boxers. He rushes out of the apartment in the middle of a storm, just wanting to print his final paper. He hops into his car, drives all the way to the *nearest* convenience store, which happens to be at the sketchiest part of town, gets there, and realizes he forgot his wallet.
So, he texts his roommate *from his car*, like, “Bruh, I’m stuck. Forgot my wallet. Send help.” Meanwhile, the storm is getting worse, and he’s standing out in the rain like a lost puppy. His roommate, being the decent human he is (but also annoyed because he’s trying to sleep), finally brings him some cash and tells him to just send the damn print file via his email.
Finally, Jake gets back to campus, prints the paper, and somehow, miraculously, makes it back before his first exam. But the whole week? Just chaos. He’s so sleep-deprived he starts hallucinating seeing his notes dance on the wall, and he talks to his coffee mug like it’s a colleague. He also ended up turning in a *completely* different paper because he mixed up his drafts after multiple sleepless nights. The prof just marked “see me after class” with a *really* confused face.
Honestly, finals week is *hell* and most of us just survive by the skin of our teeth. But stories like these? They’re legendary. It's like the universe trying to say, “Hey, maybe don’t push your limits so hard, or you’ll end up crying over spilled coffee, a dead laptop, and a puke-covered carpet.”
I mean, who needs horror movies when finals week is *this* intense? 😂
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